藉口

翻着我们的照片 想念若隐若现
去年的冬天 我们笑得很甜
看着你哭泣的脸 对着我说再见
来不及听见 你已走得很远
也许你已经放弃我 也许已经很难回头
我知道自己错过 请再给我一个理由
说你不爱我

就算是我不懂 能不能原谅我
请不要把分手当作你的请求
我知道坚持要走是你受伤的藉口
请你回头 我会陪你一直走到最后
就算没有结果 我也能够随
我知道你的痛 是我给的承诺
你说给过我纵容 沉默是因为包容
如果要走 请你记得我

如果难过 请你忘了我

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oh man, i was just browsing around my favourites folder and found a link which has all of the lyrics of jielun's songs in chinese. haha, something tt i've not touched for some time. anyway in the times when i'm sad, tt's roughly how i feel. oh shucks. but painful painful also just transient. but yeah, i felt really lousy this afternoon as i was mugging. tried praying in tongues, felt a bit better. didn't bring bible anyway so couldn't read. i mean also, afterall, xing(1) shi(4) also can tell tt many pple. even so, some pple i wanted to share my xing(1) shen(1) to weren't around too. very sad.

something i realised yesterday night after talking on the phone - it's funny how i felt so sad on sun, and how sometimes feelings may be the things which make pple fall. i was feeling a bit down today when i was mugging in the library with devin today. well, stayed till after dinner only when i bua(3) da(2) han(3) and went home. yup, i was just telling him how i was feeling and tt super nice guy really showered his c&c. haha, i'm so touched man. thanks. :)

anyway, as i was lying on my bed yesterday night waiting to fall asleep, i was thinking about how things should be before 2 pple become an item. i was just reminded again tt both should be whole. both should not have any outstanding issues, and exist as 2 complete wholes. well, before they both come and offer each other whatever they have to offer. don't come to each other with emptiness in the heart, hoping tt the new found relationship would help fill the cavity. tt's wrong.

for one, i know i'm not secure enough. amongst many other flaws. i promise i'll work on them first before anything. both have to be complete in christ. :) yeah, what a close shave, i nearly screwed things up.

tml's (or rather today since it's past 12 now) is cny eve. yay i'm so happy. going over to da(4) yi(2)'s place for reunion dinner. my family always join them for reunion dinner every year, esp when we live so near each other. and always we'll have steamboat and there'll be SO much food tt we'll all have problem finishing up. haha, such wonderful hospitality from my aunt. :P

nitey world. tml will be a bright and cheerful day full of favour and grace. :)