Tuesday, December 30, 2003

oh, saw this link at ivan's blog. thought i'ld do it and apparently "You are worth exactly: $2,069,830.00". crap anyway, cause i'm worth much more.

and what's more, i'm not for sale. period.

but try it out here!

(haha, i'm worth more than mr chua. but i don't need a website to tell me that...)

last min couldn't go for a og dinner cause i forgot i was supposed to go watch a movie with the family. and we watched scary movie 3. rather much influenced by andre who told me it was not really a bad show. :)

the humor is a bit crude at times, but nonetheless funny. i liked the blonde joke at the beginning. esp with the remote control and the radio waves bit. not much of a plot, really just 90 mins of funny rubbish. michael jackson was funny too.

it's ny eve in 13 mins time. celebrating with the jc west cg, having steamboat at marina then overnight at gan's house. and i still haven't revised. wah~~~~

Sunday, December 28, 2003

just came home from campus/cg.

yep, bid farewell to my old cg and told them i'm moving up. it's sort of sad actually to bid farewell to them but it's not like we won't be seeing each other anymore liao right? :)

qns regarding cga dn whether to move up or not have been on my mind before i left for camp. and God was faithful to answer and He just told me tt it's time for me to move on. to move up.

yep. in the 'nus others' cg now, which i must honestly say tt i'm more comfortable with actually. maybe it's God's way of telling me, "hey, it's time."

amongst other issues and my experience in camp, which i'm still typing out now on notepad. :) will post after i complete it.

Thursday, December 18, 2003

just came back from watching lotr! *grin* it's better than 2 towers i think.

but legolas oglers be forewarned, he isn't tt much the focus in this episode, so make full use of the chance whenever he appears... though i might add tt he looks quite nice in the tiara at the end of the show. yes look out for tt cute shot.

haha, enuff of scandalous stuff.

show features more on frodo and gandalf (as the book prescribes) although the move doesn't follow too strictly with the book, which is actually a norm for print to screen material. but tt's all i'm going to say abt the movie unless someone asks me abt it. :) but i'm quite happy with the $7.50 spent. oh yes, it's 3hrs 15 mins, so be prepared.

and i'm watching it again with andre and jon aw on the 28th. i really couldn't wait when i found out tt there were sneaks today... :)

leaving for malaysia later today, church camp. we're going trenggannu, and i'm going expecting. no, not pregnant. the other expecting...

nite. :)

Wednesday, December 17, 2003

went jb to shop today with my family. and when we were at it, we came to the realisation that it has been quite a number of years already since we last went on such a shopping trip together. and it was a very nice family bonding thingy cause in our busy schedules we hardly manage to catch up with each other, especially so for me even during the past 2 weeks for holidays.

THE CLOTHES AT MALAYSIA ARE REALLY CHEAP! haha~~ bit carried away there but yes, was so tempted to buy lots of stuff there but in the end didn't get much. got this nice woolen nike sweater for RM$50. which works out to be S$23-25. tt's like cheaper than a shirt lor. sweater vs shirt, quite pleased with myself. and got 1 christmas present there as well.

we had so much to eat there as well, ate at a tze(1) char(4) store, which we were supposed to have patronised regularly in the past when these shopping trips were more common, and the food was great, except for the fact tt they delievered the wrong fish to our table... and the fish we got was supposed to be for a larger table, and ours was supposed to be a smaller fish... and they actually charged us for the larger fish although it was honestly not our mistake...

so the fish was RM$50. a white promfret. i mean we didn't really mind actually since we all haven't ben eating fish regularly. and the total bill came up to abt $RM100, which is quite reasonable. but the fish cost 1/2 the bill.

thanks lor.

but i'm really keen to go with some friends again someday. maybe we can take a bus up or if better someone can drive, then can buy more stuff. jan anyone? :)

on the way home there was a jam, as always on the jb side, and i was quite peeved at the way some of the drivers drove. and i'm really not biased here but i though singaporean drivers were bad enough. but generally the driving was really rude for everyone in general and there was this car which was changing lanes everytime any lane started to move. and it's really such pple who slow down the whole queue and make the jam worse...

boy was i glad when we finally passed through the customs at the singapore side. and finally i could identify with this person who had written to the forum in st to tell of how a customs officer made her day by simply smiling warmly and saying "welcome home." i never felt so relieved before for getting out of a traffic jam.

Tuesday, December 16, 2003

haven't been blogging very regularly these days, maily because i've not much time now with so many stuff breathing down my neck and the late nights out... and when i'm actually at home, d2 has this allure tt i cannot resist.

went out for lunch today with some of the og. which i really don't recall me participating in any activity. :) haha~~ but we went to crystal jade kitchen for dim sum. quite nice. they're all very friendly and i didn't feel out of place at all so it was better than i expected. esp huili and huiting, so boistrous, lighten up the spirit. and can always laugh at their comments which are made so innociently but yet are so laughter-inducing. quite alot of nice food there. and was quite full after it. the soy sauce chicken was excellent, as was the 'pirated version' of the jap fried tofu.

then we went to catch this korean love movie at cine. wah. quite a nice story, but though not very original plot leh. but nonetheless it was touching. asked ard and found i was not the only one who had a faint urge to tear at some point along the movie.

at the end of it all just walked ard taka with a friend. was looking for the remainder of the christmas gifts i was supposed to get since i'll be going off on thurs night and won't have much time to do any more shopping before christmas.

felt really quite down towards the end of the day. too many thoughts tt ran through my mind. things tt i thought i got over with i realised i haven't. and there are now so many things to consider, and sometimes i find it really hard not to worry. but at other times it's more than worry, melancholy perhaps.

anin went for her teacher's wedding today. and interestingly george msged me to tell me tt he was attending his teacher's wedding too, and hence had some concerns arising. so coincidental. seems tt all teachers are getting married now. holiday season maybe.

and really, on the way to thej bus stop i had so many worries. ivan was telling me to cheer up and all tt but i guess i just need some time to quieten down a bit and to straighten things out. :)

will prob be going malaysia tml too for shopping with family. haven't had any in a long time liao. wesley dyed his hair in malaysia so now he has a blonde fringe. :) so did alvin, who got his hair did up in a saloon, something like ivan.

there's this nice pooh cushion i got for christmas from a friend. haha~~ very nice to the touch and very squeezable. it's the type where u can shrill in delight just by touching it. :) no, tt's not an exaggeration. :p

i'll resolve to blog more often now.

Wednesday, December 10, 2003

went bodyworlds today.

went bodyworlds today.

went with andre the GENIUS and george the GENIUS. it was very good having them around cause they could explain to me so many things and jog my memory or so much stuff. it's really a very interesting exhibition, and looking at the exhibits there are so different from those in the anat lab. and it's this process of plastination which is actually quite amazing, cause u can add colour to the differnt tissue. so the tendons are white, muscles red, nerves white/yellow etc etc. and differnt parts of the heart can be coloured different colours too. :)

and it's interesting cause u can see anatomy tt u learn in class come so identifiable and interactive. one where u can pin point what is what and feel good about yourself. :) haha~~ ego boosting session. but anyway i've realised that i've forgotton alot of my 1st semester anat liao. which is quite bad.

so mainly the exhibition was divided into skeleton and ligaments; muscles; nerves and brain; respiratory system; cardiovascular system; GI; development. so, it took us 2 hrs to finish skeleton and ligaments, nerves and brain, muscles. and then we were so tired after tt and HAD to sit down and rest. :) too taxing lar. and we ended staying there from 1340 to ard 1810. so insane. felt so mentally and physically taxed. and to be honest, i was kinda glad tt when finished the last exhibit (which was a horse) cause i was feeling hungry, thirsty, and had sore legs...

worth the $18 definately, but pple with a basic knowledge of anat will certainly enjoy it more.

and might i also add tt some of the exhibits have rather pendulous members which can be distracting. *grin*



oh, poor wm fell down during ice skating and cut his head btw the brows... poor thing. needed stitches i heard from him. hope he recovers quickly w/o any scars. :) and ask him to send a photo of him he don't want... he should post it up on his blog.

Monday, December 08, 2003

so amusing. just had lunch with my brother and we had very nice char siew rice at this stall outside. and when i came home wanted to drink some wine and when i went to pour, kinda forgot tt it was wine, not some cordial...

and i ended up filling my entire glass. aiyoh... and now i'm quite drunk i think.

tried to convince my bro tt wine's nice (and in the process help me finish 1/2 the glass) but failed miserably ever since i previously conned hom into trying the red wine.

*hiccup*

so, yesterday ivan and meihua came to visit church. wah. they hor, never tell me they're meeting for lunch until it was so late, so i had to rush like crazy to bath, change, and get down to suntec to meet them. took me 40 mins in the end. and i had to run all the way from city hall mrt to suntec. which is like insane lar. and i just thought it was quite amusing when i saw pple streaming to the mrt after their standard charted marathon. they were in running attires so i kinda figured.

yes, and we had a nice lunch at cedele. treated wm there once too and i though it was excellent. but yesterday's was a little sub standard cause they had little variety of bread. and they didn't have the walnut one which is quite nice. but it was a great lunch in the end cause had ivan to tease mar. and our conversations were always punctuated with either ivan/meihua taking a swipe at my integrity/character/face/just me in general...

i thought service yesterday was excellent. reminded me again tt how with faith all things are possible. and i think anin was quite amused at pastor's antics. yep, he's a humourous man.

and after service went off with gan and everyone else and we were talking abt love actually tt we caught on sat night. i think it's an excellent show and everyone should catch it. even better if u have a special someone to watch it with.

cause it's not one if those sickeningly sweet shows, but rather a very insightful story, which actually reminded me about man and wifeand tt tony parson's series narrating the different types of love. all the girls who went for the show thought tt office boy was cute. i thought so too but tt's beside the pt... turns out he's some brazillian model who came out in the sunday times too. yesterday's issue.

*hint hint* girls.

and what the artist guy did with the placards was excellent. but tt's about all i'll say abt the show lest pple beat me up for unwittingly revealing too much of a movie they haven't seen... ohoh, lotr is coming out and i'm reallyreallyreally looking forward to it...

was thinking of some stuff yesternight on my way home. came home and chatted to mr chua until like 1 lor. and chatted until i doozed off... so embarassing... and ended up waking up only at 12 today. piggish.

Saturday, December 06, 2003

oh, this morning's breakfast was so exciting. cooked 6 sunny side up eggs and gobbled 3 of them myself. haha~~ think this is the first time i managed to make perfect sunny side up eggs... wah... just love the yolk oozing on my tongue.

so, there's more to frying eggs than i thought. amt of oil, strength of fire, even the way u put in the egg. hmmm...

and also had lots of biscuits, and a cup of coffee in addition to 3 fried eggs. wah. then now feeling sleepy again. really think i'll become hippo-hope when i get back to sch... terrible.

finished the series on string theory. think it's excellent. quite interested to get the book now. u should watch it if u haven't yet.

going for campus at 3 later. catch a quick wink first.

oh, a friend sent me this link today. very interesting. haven't completed it yet but so far it's been good. quite addictive i might add.

good phys show!

Thursday, December 04, 2003

argh... very irritated. lost my entry abt my shopping expolits for the day...

ARGH!!!!!

came upon this on a friend's blog. quite accurate as i see it. :)


Take the 100 Acre Personality Quiz!

just came home from lunch at boon keng rd. not too near but not too far my place too.

i think it's good to go have lunch somewhere new once in a while. cause it's so refreshing to travel to new places. to try new things. to expand ur horizon. :)

i once thought tt i would adopt a motto -- to try everything at least once in life. but i realised soon after tt would not really be quite possible leh. cause tt would mean i had to eat mealworms, get my tongue pierced, take to bungee jumping, or on the tamest side to wear pink shorts and flip-flops to orchard road.

hmmm... hands up those who are visualising me in tt barney suit now. *bishbish*

yep, so it's now -- try most things at least once. and the nicer things u can try them again.

and again.

think i'll go window shopping later. something to perk me up a little would be in order. :) and have to get christmas presents too.

driving was great today! was only expecting to complete 1 module, but managed to complete 2.5!!! haha~~ so happy.

and met mr F on the way back. he was saying t he hasn't had dinner. (tt time it was abt 6) and the worst part was tt he wasn't planning to eat dinner...

what!

and also i met ziying on the way out too! haha~~ there're so many pple taking driving at ssdc. more than i realise... :)

i want to watch brother bear... and also all the nice movies tt are coming out now...

and i heard return of the king's 4 hrs long. wow.

on the way home a couple of days back i was thinking about what was happening around me. about relationships and what they all mean actually. and how true it is when someone says that when u're out looking for one, u arn't ready. i thought i knew that already. but so i didn't. and the more i ruminate on it, the more i find tt profound philosophy underlying it.

i heard on radio once that the best relationships are those which gradually develop from friendships. i think that's rather true firstly from observations of friends around me and the relationships which began from being friends at first and those which began with the guy just knowing the girl and trying to work things from there. of course, the latter usually doesn't work out.

cause there's no base there. nothing to work on. and u only see the other party in the eyes of a partner. which is frankly not enough. thinking of it, a guy-girl relationship is no more than a more-well-developed friendship where both find in each other more that special something more than in just friends. but u see, the key here is a friendship. cause things work from there.

and also because of the different roles that a friend and a partner plays. a lover is there to make u feel special. to love u. to surprise u now and then with little somethings tt remind u that u're important at least to him/her. but a friend plays a much more basic role. but being a basic role also means a broader role. a more all-encompassing role. a friend is someone who shares ur troubles, remembers little details about u, talks to u about everything under the sun, tells u and listens to ur whining about your most silly adventures yesterday night, or just simply offers advice and a shoulder to cry on in time of need.

a partner must also play these roles. and a greater extent too. they must know u better. and able to understand u much better too. i'ld like to think of it as something like a food pyramid. so the friend fills in the spaces of carbs and such; whilst the bf/gf fills in the space of the fats. we can say that the friend's role is important although basic, but the role of a soulmate adds a beautiful finishing touch to everything.

i know i can survive w/o a partner, but definately not w/o friends. just like u'll probably die from hypertension just eating fats.

tt's why pple say "u're my friend and lover". cause both roles have to come together. inseperable. for that special someone for you. he/she must be a friend first before they can be a lover.

and any relationship based on fats alone kills.

and often it's our impatience that makes us go straight for the fattest cut of meat instead of starting on the rice first. cause we want everything to be perfect without putting in the due work. but blame it on inexperience as well. and when the other party is a more experienced diner, they'll take things more slowly. which gets u fustrated at times, and u just start to screw things up by showing ur immaturity and desperate side. so, u find that when the next course comes, u're the only one left at the table. lucky if it's desert already. but i was left alone to foot the bill when the appetiser just came in.

but i'm not blaming anyone here, cause i chose the kid's set lunch even before she arrived.

and it's good now tt i'm 1 up on dining experience. although i've always told myself one meal would be enough.

but tt meal doesn't count if u started off and ended up eating alone.

still haven't penned down all the thoughts yet. but it's late. so i'll sleep now.

and guess what. tml's 1st day of holiday! i'll try to get pple to go to bodyworlds/shopping. otherwise it's just me again.

Wednesday, December 03, 2003

hmmm. the happenings these days have started me thinking again about priorities in life.

just came home from dinner with ivan and alvin. and cause ivan had to cut hair first so i was walking ard on my own in far east. i was looking at the shops there and the people there. and i suddenly thought to myself how ironical this is. the youngsters here are spending so much lor. and it's supposed to be a hip and happening place. but how can they spend so much money when they arn't even making the $? yes. they $ must come from someone, their parents. sometimes u can just tell from their mannerisms tt they're probably not really very well off anyway. but yet spending so much. it's just not right.

and alot of them just dress up really well or so they think. or i think. and some of them have quite good dress sense actually. but is that what really attracts? is that what pple look for? or more of another attempt to pierce the thick barrier into gaining social acceptance and recognition?

but it's so silly. cause the measure of success is definately not whether u have the hippest watch or coolest 3/4s or the funkiest hairdo. and the pple who use these standards to measure whether u're cool or hip enough arn't really successful themselves. and tt's from my standard, which i believe is more realistic.

the successful person is one who has a good career. and of course there are many other aspects to being successful, but this is just one which i think is quite important. cause a person with a good career is attractive. cause he is someone who is able to take care of the family and able to provide. isn't tt supposed to be a more impt point? i mean, even if u have the coolest attire, accessories and sorts, but unable to get a good paying job and give ur wife and family a good quality life, what's the point?

which often brings to mind this image of a cute guy and a beautiful wife who are iving a a cramped house with a baby in her arms and newspapers in his arms. the baby's crying away and he can't be bothered, she's screaming away at him, and give them a couple of years down.

look at the advertistments around and u'll come to the realisation that if they don't have the money, where are they going to get those clothes/cars/handphones that they are modeling for? so what? is it tt good looks are really just a an accessory item in life? i guess so. just weigh which situation is better -- to have an attractive partner but trouble paying the bills; a average looking partner with the ability to afford much more in life.

cause the bottom line is still whether u're able to provide. and tt's the more (although not most) important factor here. and of course pple who have successful careers and are good looking as well are hot stuff. which is why most of them are quickly snapped up.

but of course. but these are the rare species.

so what are we really looking for? for acceptance? for pple to look at u and say "wah... look at the guy/girl there... so chio/yandao." is that it? but does that really matter? does it change ur life at all? it may make u feel better for a moment but has it really changed ur life? the only way it has is probably to increase ur faith in material things and cause u to end up spending even more to furthur enhance ur 'image'. cause the moment of satisfaction then has been so sweet. but it's only a moment isn't it.

lots of things are going through my mind now. i'll continue tml but i've got to sleep now.

Monday, December 01, 2003

now this is one entry that i find hard to put down. the 1st part at least.

was feeling depressed again when i turned on the radio just now. and 933 was playing their ying(1) yue(4) ri(4) ji(4). and it just got me started thinking on lots of stuff again. especially stuff tt yy was telling me a couple of days ago tt got me a little down. and the radio programme sort of amplified tt tiny bump on life's road. and made me feel much more miserable. for a while at least...

and i just think sometimes and it's really amazing. how although the signs say 'SHOO.' but if anything is just a hairbreadth short of a downright rejection S-P-E-L-L-E-D out so clearly i couldn't see anything else when it's in front of me, i just choose to believe the other. it's really so amazing. so amazing tt when i really take a step back and look at it, it's ridiculous.

and today i finally understand why pple choose to totally not talk to their ex. cause it's painful. hurts when all the memories come back. i used to think it was a cowardly, even silly way to deal with issues. well, now at least i can understand although it's not really the same situation for me.

yes. i just heard someone over the radio say, (in chinese translated) "i've realised that although we meet with so many unhappy things in life, we must realise that there are so many more happy things in life that we can look forward to and count on."

arn't humans weird... sometimes we just choose to dwell on the sad stuff. yes. weird har? but there just seems to be this weird 2nd me tt just draws me back to wallow in self pity. there's some sense of satisfaction in that really.

and then again it's a vicious cycle tt just gets me sadder. i know that. but i can't help it some times.

yep, as someone said, such feelings of loneliness don't last. but only if u choose not to dwell on them. and i don't think i'll be. yay! :) and when i'm sad i binge ALOT. feeling quite bloated now, so better start getting happy before i get fat. :) i hate getting fat. argh. hope and fat must NEVER come together. go figure.

ohoh. i treated andre to lunch today. :) wm was busy so it was only the 2 of us. we had shui(2) jiao(3) mian(4). oei... before u start thinking "cheh. i thought eat what", i would have one somewhere else infact and was thinking of going to nooch actually. and i also don't know what happened in the end. maybe it was because i had 2 lunches. haha. nothing to do with me being sad, but i was so hungry at first tt i had to sit down to eat with jiabin some noodles. and coffee. and curry puff. argh. i'm disgusting myself lor... eat and eat like a pig liddat. and i just had supper too. and supper yesterday also... wah lau ei... *demoralised*

oh. guohao passed his driving today. congratulated him just now. and i'm driving so slowly now... as in my progress lar. only covered 1 module today. tt's like how slow. and it's so expensive also lor. $58.24 as pak ling pointed out today. so i only learnt right turn today. tt's like how demoralising... george had his first driving lesson today. hope it went well. will ask him in sch tml.

oh. ivan's also 1st driving lesson tml. hope he enjoys it. :)

wah... u realise it's the 1st of dec today?? time really flies. and looking back, this is the year which has left me with so many memories. both sweet and sad. yesyes. all flavours also have one leh. :) this is the year i'll remember. of my 19 yrs THIS is the one when the most has happened. it has been a long but memorable year, but so sad it's ending liao. really, so much has happened in this year. so much has happened.

well, there's always next year. hope hopes tt it'll be one with the sweet stuff but don't want the bitter things can or not?? :)

and anin's just said tt i seem to be in a good mood today. well... actually was not really. in fact was sad. but after typing it all out feel much better now. i have another entry which mentions all much clearer but i don't think i'm publishing tt. :)

and there are just so many things tt are coming to mind now which i'ld like to blog too. like how amazing george is and what a genius he is. we came up with somethign like, "george the genius, YES HE KNOWS!" to the tune of bob the builder if u haven't kinda figured. and today after lunch andre, pakling, stella, george, jack, me, and some other guy were talking in the "frontier" after lunch. actually it was only andre and me and we were chatting after lunch, then stella and pakling came along, then george. then jack and his blue-shirted friend. and then we were talking and talking abt everything. until we realised we were sitting there for 2 hours.

siao...

nad i've been typing this for quite long too. at least 2 hours. mainly because of all the snipping off and editing. :) must practise censorship also mar. which is a thing i find quite controversial since i resolved to put up my inadultered views. but i realised tt tt's not totally possible cause certain things just call for privacy and others demand tact. so i just keep a diary for more personal stuff. and it works rather well this way.

okok. think i'll end it here. there's pdp tml. and i'm thinking of meeting with ivan and alvin tml. they're cutting hair in the evening and maybe we can go for dinner after tt. i'll go run i think. is it too insane? aiyar. still tu somemore really too late liao.