oh yay!

was sick yesterday night. but now feeling much better already. :) didn't go school today, so missed the 2 lectures in the morning. hope i didn't miss much.

oops. ivan just told me the lecture was actually quite good. argh.

nose is clearing up now. great. feeling so much better.

but stoning around at home today gave me alot of time to think about issues tt i don't usually think of. and of course it's related to yesterday's feleinig sad lar. *grin* felt down yesterday because i suddenly felt so lonely. yes. i mean it in the sense as in when everyone has tt special someone to talk to and all that. then somemore i fell ill yesterday. wahahaha i just felt terrible yesteraday. but u see, today is a better day! just tt the only regret is tt i didn't mug today. actually i wanted to at least study 1 chapter of lippincotts. but didn't get down to it. slept like a pig.

ohoh. wm told me he wanted to set up a blog. i think tt's quite nice. though i can just imagine him writing only on emily.

and talking abt wm, my hypothesis was right about him not the type keeping cards and such. i think when andre and i asked him what happened to the book we gave him he said he lost it or something to tt extent. and he wasn't joking. no he wasn't.

i mean seriously...

oh. clarinase works wonders. if u haven't tried it, u must use it the next time u have a blocked nose and just feel TERRIBLE. clears ur nose in just a while. and u really forget tt u were sick.

heard mrs lee didn't go sch today. and haven't seen her on icq either for 2 days liaoz. was suggesting to ivan tt she got kidnapped. *shocked* (so if anin is reading this, pls show some indication tt u're still there yar? just to dispell these myths)

yes, and i was saying, i think i was very depressed yesterday. but this afternoon i was thinking of what cherlyn told me some time ago after the class chalet when i felt terrible. about these feelings of loneliness. she was saying tt these sad lonely feelings don't last unless u choose to dwell on them. tt's so true. and i don't think i want to dwell on them anymore. :)

and i'm feeling alot better about the depression already. :)

but it's so queer, cause immediately after i thought things through, wherever i turned the shows on tv were all showing plots which are those tt make me feel sad. like on holland v and br4thers. don't ask me why i was watching them. i'm sick remember? not in the mood for mugging. never was anyway.

ivan is so funny. just now somehting about "play 1/2 way". SO hillarious. u guess what happened. girls if u'll don't know him yet quick get to know him today. what to do, my site also needs some advertisers sometime mar. could do with some xtra bucks...

yes, it's one of those days again... back to my melancholic self. cause there're these times when i just think of events in the past few months, i see how my emotions went from high to low, up and down. and there were some good memories. and u know, the nice memories are the ones tt hurt.

nvm. so many stuff i want to type, and actually i did already, but it's just really too personal. oh well.

driving today went ok.

feel it's silly going for 2 lectures only tml. feel like staying at home.

fri as well, same thing. maybe i should just stay at home tml and wallow in self pity...

i think fall is a nice season. and it's just so romantic. having a walk. perfect for anything. sigh.

actually didn't feel like blogging one. lazy mar. :)

today the results for physio CA3 and CA4 came out. didn't do too well for physio, but CA4 was alright. :) and i'm glad it turned out fine cause CA4 was the first one i started trusting and not studying so hard. and i admit it was hard to have complete faith. :)

but since now the results are fine, i guess it's easier for me to step out more in faith. :) not the most ideal approach but i guess i'm not perfect. *grin* so next's CA5.

supposed to have pdp today. but prof goh stood us up. argh. 1 good thing tt happened from it was tt i got to taste some nice curry puff in the NUH canteen. the public foodcourt one. stall nearest to the corridor. tasty curry puff.

and it cost 80c (20% pff from $1).

mrs lee called me mrs chua today. and insisted tt mr chua is mrs ang. scandalous. don't know why i'm putting this here anyway. oh well.

sleep earlier today. goodnight. still talking to ivan now though...

u know, sometimes it's kinda sad when u finally come to terms tt ur love is not reprociated. she probably isn't even reading this blog. nvm... (don't noe what reprecussions here, but i thought i'll just type this for me to rem.)

yes, goodnight.

today's pdp was quite memorable. argh. so many stuff to enter, but i'm also so tired already... and i mentioned i wanted to write abt the new friends tt i met who have wonderful testimonies... and i also want to write abt today... oh well... briefly briefly abt each then.

one of the new friends i met on sat was clarence. he was from normal academic in lower sec. but u know he was in the hcjc caregroup when i met him yesterday. and of course he was in hcjc. duh. yes, normal accademic in lower sec. and his story is truly amazing. he was quite demoralised in sec1, and he was telling us how he then worked hard to end up winning 9 of the 10 accademic prizes in his cohort. so after sec2 he went around looking for another school cause he wanted to go into express. went to about 10 schools, and was rejected by all. but God was with him all the way. finally went to chung cheng, and when he met the principal, he thought she was a cleaning lady. :) cause she was carrying coffee and looked quite disheveled. and at tt time there were abt 50 pple on the waiting list. but favour was on him and when he talked to the principal, she offered him a place immediately in front of the 50 others. wow. and from then on he just kept witnessing how God worked in his life in the academic field, and he just continued to do very well in all his tests, even if he didn't really study too hard. and then, he got to hcjc.

wow. he's in j1 now. aspiring doctor. normal academic. hcjc.

and tt's not the end of it. he did a diploma in accounting while studying this year, and is now planning to do a degree in accounting while still studying in jc. he has still been doing very well in school. by the grace of God.

when he tells pple his story, no one believes him. me too at first. i bet u too. but it's true. it's just simply amazing.

i know the miracle tt God has worked in his life, and i know tt the same is possible for me too. cause we serve the same living God.

then abt the patient who i met today at pdp. can't remember her name though. but she'll leave an unforgettable impression on me. why? for those who are in my pdp, u would understand why. she's suffering from diabetes, family history of it as well. and her left eye's blind from cataracts (i think) due to the diabetes; neuropathy and therefore leading to amputation of both legs - the left at the hip joint and right above the knee joint; water retention in both arms; and her right eye is steadily losing vision.

on top of tt, her husband is jobless, and who anyway has to stay at home to look after her, and they have financial problems.

doesn't have any children.

so why should someone like her impress me so much?

cause in all her trials, she isn't depressed. yes, although she has her own fair share of worries. in fact, she seems less troubled than many of us before/after a CA. to us, the CA is like one of the biggest concerns in our lives, but frankly when compared to her problems, they simply don't hold a candle.

and yet she wasn't depressed.

when jiabin asked her why, she replied in chinese, "because i'm a believer in Christ. and i cast my cares on Him." tt was the essence of what she was saying, and those in my pdp grp can vouch for tt.

something just like stirred a bit in me.

"Thou wilt keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on thee: because he trusteth in thee. Trust ye in the LORD for ever: for in the LORD JEHOVAH is everlasting strength." Isaiah 26:3,4

now THAT set me thinking.

goodnight.

my icq's not working. not very nice considering i chat alot on it... hope's it'll figure itself out soon.

been reading song of solomon. it's so ineresting. so many interpretations of the net. but i think if God termed it the GREATEST song of all solomon's 1005 songs, it must really speak of something important. something like Jesus and the Church. yes, wonderful love story there. but haven't figured so many things out. the significance of each and every detail...

tml will be a super hectic day. lessons in the morn, then PDP ard lunch time, then got to rush off for driving in afternoon, and then meeting at old church office at 1930.

ms Y seems to be dealing with some problems. can't find a milder word for problems? like today during the sharing session, she quite bothered with something. asked her but she didn't say anything. think it's schoolwork, esp with all the projects she's doing. quite heavy it seems. she had alot to do on fri and had to leave early. hope the season will pass soon.

oh, the triple chocolate thingy at coffee club was so good! brownie + vanilla ice cream. simply delightful! *squeals*

ok, tt was bad for the image, but i'll just leave it. :p

song of solomon!!! very interesting book. very profound.

gotta start packing tml's stuff liaoz. busy day. and i don't want to miss my bus in the morning just because i'm packing my stuff. :)

today was a great day! really enjoyed myself, and haven't so in a long time... it was a combined caregroup session with all the rest of the jc pple. and gibbs and maddy came along too! :) played soccer, frisbee at palawan beach. and the weather was so nice too. got to know so many more new friends, like.... erm. can't remember their names at the moment. was never good with names... *sheepish*

yesyes. i discovered i can play soccer! and frisbee too. i always said tt frisbee is a game for dogs... so maybe i'm just a big dog. oh well. crap.

yesyes. and soccer and frisbe was so fun! i think i like frisbee. made some nice intercepts. :) i'm sure no one who went for the outing reads this blog... and soccer was quite fun too. though i must say it was SUPER tiring. and the sand at the beach was so super hard to run on. w/o the sandals it was so painful after a while to run on. but with the sandals it was very hard to control ur steps. aiyar. u'll know when u actually try to run on sand.

and the worship session we had at a grassy area was so good. pity it just started to rain after a while. the annointing was really there. so tangible. but again, after like 5 mins, the rain stopped. *yay* we were then at a shelter continuing with our worship, but some pple ran off to play. like the rest of the guys who were very fascinated with the playground all of a sudden, and charis and gerri who started dancing on the sand. amazing those 2 girls. :)

but now my feet hurt from the abrasion from the sand... hurts a little...

then we went pasta mania at wtc for dinner. very nice food. had a upsized mushroom thingy (yes i'm super bad at remembering names...). and garlic bread and soup. very full. and a full man's a happy man! :)

oh, the 2 pple i met today were very interesting pple. 1 has a amazing testimony tt i will put in t he entry tml, cause it's getting rather late now; and the other's a mta awardee. also my boss type. i think he's also a testimony. okok. i'll put more details tml cause they do deserve more than the single line tt i've typed so far.

ok. talking to ronald now. at least the last thing was me asking him a qns... not replied yet. talking to mr lee's wife too. complaining to her abt so many things... very bad of me. :)

ok. sleeping time. goodnight! :)

been reading news on reuters. must say it's quite entertaining.

like how they managed to make worms live 6 times as long. and they try to equate it with humans. ewww... can't imagine tt . esp with the rest of the other things they do to achieve ur 500-yr old status.

like being castrated to double ur lifespan.

haha. 500 yr old eunuch. not exactly a very appealing thought.

anyway, live tt long for what? to see ur great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-grandchildren and don't even know their names.

here's the site if u're interested. http://www.reuters.com/newsArticle.jhtml?type=scienceNews&storyID=3678791

just suaned ivan on icq. suan him real bad. but he's so funny, a real great guy to talk to. if u're in need of a great snag to talk to girls, contact ivan at icq no: 10234400.

great guy as i said. he was telling me abt his first time. in a ktv. very expensive. but very thrilling also.

*grin*

tsktsk... not lar. it was his first time going to sing in a ktv with some friends... for 3 hrs they had to pay $131.06 for 4 ppl. wow. but i also want to go ktv someday. then it'll be my first time too. in a ktv. very expensive. but very thrilling also. :)

yes, and i think friendster is going to crash... i can't even log in sometimes now...

ok. feeling REALLY crappy today. tml's prog: going sentosa in late morning tml, then going for a MCF dedication serive in the late afternoon. frankly i don't really feel like going for MCF, but since i agreed to go, think i should. nutting to do at night though.

face it.

no one's going to get me tt chardonnay. and it was more of a try out my luck type of thing, so i don't wasn't really expecting anything. :) (ps: any late offers will still be accepted with glee~~)

read a few blogs today, and i must say tt it's a real revelation into what pple are thinking. and maybe it's this type of voyerism tt satisfies an inert human instinct in all of us. and yet this goes 2 ways, cause there's another voice in us which tells us tt we want to have our views heard and mean something. even if we're not comfortable to speak these stuff out verbally. so, tt's why i find this appeal through what blogs offer.

to the high-scorer-who-irritated-me: "know what? the best friends are those who can stick together despite knowing how each feels abt the other in the few times where they annoyed with each other and can still stand each other." :) and i always believe that candidness/frankness is essential in any relationship. cause if the other party means the slightest but to u at all, u'll not want to hide behind a screen. so i always tell the other party what i really think and feel.

so, is frankness the most important factor in all relationships? yes and no. cause it depends on the type of friendship tt u're looking at. for argument's' sake, let's just classify all relationships into those btwacquaintances and those btw friends. the 3rd category would be btw tt special someone, but let's not dwell into tt.

acquaintances are nice pple to have ard u. cause they lubricate ur course in life. they expand ur social circle. u wave hi to them in the lib when u meet them on the staircase or in the corridors. but tt's basically the end of it. u don't even feel like having lunch with them and will probably feel the urge to quickly finish up ur lunch and excuse urself should u end up sitting at the same table with them for a meal, simply because u won't feel comfortable in a period of silence with them. it just feels awkward.

these pple are good to have ard, but u won't sense their absence if they fade away into the background. i don't feel it's necessary to be totally frank to them.

the basis of being frank to someone is actually offering a peekhole where pple can see u as u actually are. it's a passageway where thoughts from u can get out into the outside world. think of it as the hole in the interosseus membrane where veins and arteries can communicate with the other side. (just spoilt the mood didn't it :p) in fact, this is a vunerability tt u're exposing urself to. cause u're subjecting ur thoughts and feelings to purview of others. and it takes courage to do tt. and only pple who matter are worth tt courage.

and pple who are worth tt courage are pple who u want to keep ard u for life. the relationship with them can truly be termed a friendship. and how can u claim tt u have a real friendship if there's always this membrane of falseness dividing u 2? u'll never know the person as he/she really is. the relationship u're having is one with a 'fake' him/her.

only when u see the person as he/she really is, and still find the person over the other side as a friend, not an acquaintance, is there real friendship.

of course, there has to be a great deal of discretion exercised here, and discernment is paramount. and the membrane can't just disappear all at once, but has to slowly enlarge bit by bit as time goes by.

but definately no friendship w/o frankness is worth keeping.

i've met many friends through the yrs, from pri sch all the way to uni, and i'm gonna stick with them all the days of my life. :) how abt u?

found tt i don't have much stuff to do in the next few days. :) wow, will be quite free, which is good cause i think i deserve a break.

played wc3 with wm just now. wasn't very satisfying, cause as the game progressed, so many pple quit and it was down to me and wm against this other chap. and he quit too soon after tt.

oh well. as i said, it wasn't very satisfying.

unlike the games tt i played this afternoon. very adrenaline pumped. :) it was much more exciting, maybe also due to the fact tt there were not too many leavers and the pple playing were of at least certain calibre.

yes, in case u're trying to make out how m uch i've been playing, it's been the whole day since i go home. :) can't blame me, cause i haven't touched it for almost a month already...

today was rj open house. and as per custom, it was also the hc open house. didn't go back rj anyway, cause i was quite tired. really felt like sleeping, but still ended up playing when i go home. so, i'm rather *nod* tired *nod* now... *snore*

weiliang and shuwei went back though.

gan came to visit us at nus today! really will miss him when he goes overseas. leaving for JCC(brunei) in 2 wks, and won't be seeing him for 3 wks after tt. so it'll be 5/6 wks b4 i see him again. *sob*

had lunch with kim and gan and andre at nuh staff canteen, then andre went home and the 3 of us went to see kim's bunk/room in sheares hall. IT'S VERY NICE... i see liaoz also want to stay hostel... it's small and cozy and snug. and there's lots of pics of her and ong all around. so sweet. :) and there's this mini mini pic of her family. *ponders*

but the room's very nice. there's a small fridge and tv, and radio, and nice pond downstairs tt can be seen from her room which is shaped in the form of the letter 'b'. cause she stays in block 'b'. lionel stays in 'e'. :)

I ALSO WANT TO HALL...

i better get sleeping now. nitez. :)

u know what's so good abt blogs? u can get to write down stuff tt u think of or feel, and still have pple comment on it. yet, we should never tailor our blogs to others' tastebuds. cause this blog is abt what i think and feel. and it's more of a record for me to look back at down the road and see how i've grown or where things went wrong. and a way for me to destress too. :)

but then again, tt's just my pt of view. (:

today was quite ok. this round, i don't study as hard and don't press myself tt hard. because the battle is not mine, but the Lord's. *yay* i heard today tt diana passed her driving test. and it was a retest. but she said tt this time she didn't go for any 'revision' b4 the test. see, my theory on resting in the Lord is actually quite true. not only this instance, but many other examples too.

and i'm sure this CA will be the same thing. it's not tt i never study, but i put in effort. just tt i don't push myself unecessarily.

and i'll be waiting for the results to be out. CA4 tt is. :)

met prof m.chung today outside 'frontier' just before i went home. a little awkward, cause i was supposed to get back to him on UROP. but didn't contact him abt this till i met him this evening. oh well. told him i'll not be doing due to my bio chem results being less than satisfactory. ie sucky. i'm glad he asked me to apply again nxt yr. but maybe tt's just a ke(4) qi(4) hua(4).

oh yes. he beiping impressed me very much today. we were talking abt the relation btw pneumothorax and marfan's syndrome. and he didn't know abt its existance when stella mentioned it during tutorial. and at the end of the tut he went to stella to get the name of the disease (marfan's) to check up more on it. just 2 su(2) yu(3) came to mind: bu(4) chi(3) xia(4) wen(4) and huo(2) dao(4) lao(3) xue(2) dao(4) lao(3). :)

gibbs msged me today. asked me if i as kneen to serve in SOH/SML. told him i'll pray abt it and get back to him. actually i've wanted to serve for quite some time already. but just didn't know how and where. esp since i'm so inert type and don't talk ard much...

pray abt it. my heart wants to serve. and i'm sure if i do, it'll be a big step forward for me. :)

talking to ivan now. very nice guy to talk to. keps saying tt he's shuai. oh well.

going swimming with guohao tml. but he wants to squeeze it btw CA and lecture. don't think tt's quite possible. see how things go lor...

what blogs are for? i think blogs as more for myself to read, than for satisfying other pple. so i'll just write what comes to mind, although i'll try to change names of pple who i'm writing non-pleasant comments abt. (:

today feeling a little melancholic. ivan was asking me why, and i told him i'll blog it. anyway i'ld rather type it out for my own rememberance than just chat with him over icq. tt way can see after some time.

wm finally joined friendster today! and it was only after emily joined. well, the wonders of love. :) and it's wm's bdae today! tt's quite nice. andre and i got him a book. terry brooks. hope he likes it. it's rather expensive. and at least it's a book tt doesn't make pple sad. unlike the one tt i got for my bdae from him and emily. felt so sad after reading it. cause in a way i found it related a little to my situation at tt time. and it just made me feel worse when i saw the sort of 'happy' ending at the end. so touched. but i knew what i was going through made me envious of the main chars in the story. maybe a little irrationale. but nonetheless nothing much went wrong.

making no sense? oh well.

in fact, i've been asking mr T to join friendster for some time already. but he just refused. but the moment ms N joined, he just joined so fast. it made me sort of irritated. well, irritated is not the right word. maybe more indignant. cause i just look at the wonders what love does. and i start wondering how far friendship is from courtship.

it all depends what someone sees in a friendship. and the value that the person tags to the friendship. is tt a fair statement to make? i value friendship very much, and i believe tt every friend tt crosses my path was meant to be in my life. no one meets me by chance. and everyone is pit there by God for a purpose. so to me, every relationship is special and i treasure each friend very dearly. but the way some pple treat friendships just make me think tt they don't mean anything to them. and u see that they are not the insensitive side tt they shove right into ur face. why? simply because u see tt they are a whole new person when in the presence of the person they fancy.

yes. i mean, u know tt they're are not the i can't care type of person cause u see them being the nice person (tt u hope they will be in ur relationship with them) when they are with their partner. can't help it, but it just sends me the signal tt either "nah. he's not worth my effort..." or "this relationship's not worth it."

so, what am i expecting? am i expecting tt pple treat me in the same manner as they would tt someone special?

well, not to the same extent, cause tt someone special does deserve more. but i would certainly think it's not w/o our means to put in slightly more effort to make friendships friendships. cause i know i treasure ALL my friendships very much. (:

yes, i've taken away the photos there. don't think they look nice. and i added a happy tree link. i just watched their halloween clip. psycho i tell u. and i felt rather disturbed after watching it.

late now. sleep soon. u know yy got converted? correct me if i'm wrong. so happy for him and charmain. :)

apparently cherlyn wanted to go see david blaine too with her friends. but it's too crowded there. smart move not to go. i know i hate crowds for one. i think he's insane. stayed in tt plastic cube for 40 days odd (yar?) and it's quite silly tt they jave to hospitalise him once he was taken out on the basis of reintroducing him to food. the news reports tt if the process is too sudden it'll be life threatening.

oh well. the weird things tt happen everyday.

it's fall now in london and the leaves are just starting to turn yellow/red/brown. think it's very nice. haven't seen fall yet when all the leaves change colour. though i know i would really luv to in the future.

and i was taught a new way of typing a smiley. like that- (: interesting yar? but i'm too used to this - :)

i'm glad life goes on fine. and sometimes we wonder if we are ever the actors we hope to be in pple's lives.

*yawn* getting delirious. 'night.

hmm. it's 9 now... should be studying, but think i've done the studying for today... so now it's r&r. i donm't think i want to work so hard already. the results are just unreflective of the work put in.

i remember the ao chinese papers. the first paper i sat for, i studied like crazy. and lo and behold, it was a c6. one of the worst in class. so i had to retake it and spend a couple more months attending chinese lessons. but when the next one came, i just told myself i wouldn't touch any book. and the results were more than satisfactory.

not tt i'm trying to say i'm smart or anything (which i obviously am not), but i find tt sometimes i bother myself with too many concerns and worries. and in the process don't let Jesus bring out the best in me. yes not me. Jesus. He's the one who does the work for me. unless i don't let Him by trying too hard.

something i've realised is tt i shouldn't try too hard. but there must still be work done, but not to the point till i fall ill and sorts. which i've experienced lately while studying for ca3. so now i just study and when i feel tired, i just stop. i don't force myself to go on studying. *yay*

and i'm sure ca4 will be better.

which brings me to another pt. my suspicions were confirmed today when i found mr T in an exceptionally happy mood. my guess was tt cause the CA results were out. and he did quite ok. while although i was supposed to have beat him, somehow my score was less than what i expected through checking the ans. and i honestly think i remembered the ans i put down correctly. don't know what went wrong, but oh well. it's ok.

cause ca4 will be better. :)

yes, he was in such a brilliant mood and was just dying for me to ask him how much he got. and the insults suddenly disappeared. wait no. there was one sacarstic remark. sigh. nvm... hope he grows up for his own sake.

and not tt things got better when i got home too, cause there's another person who was complaining to me abt how bad her day was. and how distracted she was cause she's so happy tt she got a good mark for her CA. QUITE a good mark. to think of it. distracted because she got a high mark. and kb to ME of all pple. and not say she doesn't know tt i'm disappointed with my marks. sigh. as andre says: "about as sensitive as a rock."

but i don't blame her. cause i know she didn't mean to irritate me (unlike the comments mr T made last week). and i've forgiven her already. but hopefully she doesn't do tt often :) [ yes i think u're probably(99%) reading this, and i hope u don't mind me being candid. :p ]

the yanzi's yu(4) jian(4) is very nice. very nice song. just heard it 933.

ivan just went to study.

me too. go do some revision now.

oh, received a mail from cherlyn yesterday. so seems it's fall down there now. haven't seen fall yet but i think it's beautiiful. and besides fall i want to see snow too. as in real snow where u can build snowmans with. saw it once i china when we were waiting for a cablecar up some mountain in yunnan(which of course i can't rem the name since my chinese is all down the drain...) but tt didn't count cause it was only flakes of snow. i actually caught a snowflake with my hand. it was so exciting. hope to go see snow again soon. maybe with some friends in the holidays.

and suddenly memories of the not so distant past seem to come back. especially when i'm talking to ivan now and he's telling me stuff tt would really relate to my feelings some time earlier this year. and suddenly i feel a teeny bit sad. but not for long. cause Christ took away tt feeling 1k yrs ago. :)

if i posted my diary entries ard tt time it'll all become clearer, but since there're names and all, and much more personal stuff, i guess i won't.

late. would type more, but i'm sleeping now. goodnight.

wm's bdae is on *thinks* thursday. andre and i are getting him and book. actually andre's getting it, and i'm sharing in the present. quite interesting, cause andre asked if we should get him a card. thought not 'cause wm's the insensitive type and i can just see the card stuffed in some compartment in his bag and he'll pull it out sometime next year all crumpled and mouldy. something more usable would are better presents for him.

and i still want to get posters for nervous system to hang in my room... quite expensive actually, abt $35. i've got the muscular and skeletal system ones already. quite interesting although i must admit i don't use them as often as i think i should to justify the cost...

oh. and charis' bdae is coming too. fri i think. 31st? *oh dear... not too sure... thankfully she doesn't read my blog...* think i should take some time to list out all my friend's bdaes and put them on my blog site too. maybe depavali.

yay, i've got quite some friends now on friendster! so happy. and it was just one PK last week. haha~~ but PK still has more. many more. but it's not the quantity but the quality, and yea i've good friends around me.

yes tt silly sean was diaoing me at marina yesterday. all thanks to zj. as always. him and all his rubbish...

ohoh. HM4 dates are out. 15th to 18th. the 1st downpayment is today. better remember to get a cheque from dad. actually i haven't asked him yet if i could go... slipped my mind yesterday night.

hmmm... fresh fire 1 is quite godd actually. i never listened to it as i'm doing now. maybe tt's because i prefer worship songs than praise songs, and the 1st half of the cd is more praise songs. i just lose track after a while. but the worship songs at the back are very nice. songs like through it all, power of ur love, let us exalt his name. very nice. :) and when i look at the copyright date, i'm just reminded of the long time since that i've join NCC. it has really been a long time since then. when pastor was still wearing a blue suit with yellow tie... haha~~ when i first saw it, i thought the only reason anyone could be wearing tt was 'cause it is part of a 'uniform'. oh well...

*some of the cg doesn't have fresh fire 1. i don't have fresh fire 2. and i want!!! think sean is burning for them ff1.*

and although the church has changed a bit and grown alot, the God there is the same yesterday, today and forever. and i'm still touched by Him from day to day.

still have abt 40 pages of snells to cover.

today the family's coming over to NCC too. manage to persuade my dad to come along, cause i don't think the derbyshire one teaches enough on the gifts and fruits. and i see no reason for my family to not know how to claim our inheritance in Christ. thank God for pastor prince and his ministry.

and yy and charmain are coming afterwards for the 2pm service too! *yay* pray tt yy can receive Christ soon too, both for his and charmain's sake. :)

today is a very special day that i will always remember, cause i went up for an altar call at youth service and 1 leader laid hands on me(still don't know who). i was slain. it's was first experience of it. what's it like? u just feel like giving up all unto Jesus. 'lose control' of urself in a sense. u just tell urself 'hey, i give up', and receive the rest that Jesus is offering. and when i was lying on the floor i was just so touched by the presence and love of Jesus that i couldn't stop talking in tongues. just went on and on and the flow was just unending. u then disregard the things around you and this enclosure, sheath, tunnel, just comes around you, tt just seems to connect u with Jesus directly. u can really feel His arms around your heart and there's a sense of comfort and belonging and love. and even after i went back to my seat, i couldn't stop speaking in tongues. i just went on and on for quite some time after the music ended. it was simply amazing. simply amazing.

there was a sense of release that came. and at that moment i just knew that my problems were lifted from my shoulders. they were now no longer mine to carry, but the Lord's.

what was the altar call for? it was for people who felt anxiety in their hearts and also for people who needed healing. i needed both. and i'm so glad that God gave me the faith to go up there to receive. and i'm glad i did.

"My burden is light and My yoke is easy."

praise God.

the sequence of events on fri and sat have amazed me. during bs and youth service, the messages by both pastor and coach maddy were SO personalised to me and really spoke to me at my level. and they answered the questions i had in my mind. or rather God was the one who answered them. i knew in my heart that the message was for me. the altar call was for me. and God loved my so much tt He planned His plans for me to comfort and to help me grow in faith in Him and to KNOW that He loves me.

and i know He does.



could we with ink the oceans fill,
or were the skies of parchment made.
were every stalk on earth a quill,
and every man a scribe by trade.

to write the love, of God above,
would drain the oceans dry.
nor could the scroll, contain the whole,
though stretched from sky to sky.

the love of God how rich and pure,
how measureless and strong!
it shall forevermore endure,
the saints and angels' song.

what does it take to trust?

that word is so elusive. what's the thing in us that makes us believe in someone/something? what abt faith?

i find it hard at times to believe God for miracles. it's much easier to believe in the things that u see around you and trust in your circumstances and ur own ability to bring urself out of the rubbish that u're in.

"faith pleases God. and if my heart trusts in Him, i'm helped. and His plans for me are for good and not for evil, to prosper me. that although i may walk in the shadow of the valley of darkness, His rod and staff are there to comfort me. that He provides for the birds of the sky and the lillies of the field although they worry not about tml. and i know that i'm worth much more than them."

but often i find not the faith that i need to make me step out in faith.

yes, this faith also comes from God, i know that. but maybe i just know it and not really know it.

yes. do i really know these verses?

it's at times when i'm down and out that i find it easiest to depend on His mercy and grace. why? because it is at these times when i realise that my strengths are insufficient to pull me through and when all in the flesh has failed, i have 'no choice' but to turn to supernatural means of solving my problem. anyway, since i already realise that physical means have failed, how much more worse can it? it becomes more of a 'taking a chance' thing and look and see what will happen.

i started thinking a bit about this after CA3. when i mugged every day for the whole week, from right after school till about 9. every day. except maybe fri when i went for bs. but i realise that it was hard not to stop mugging. especially when everyone around you was mugging. u feel the pressure to go hit the books, even when ur mind is so tired and u just yearn to go relax. go out for dinner with the family, have a solid worship session in the room, go have some quiet time, catch up with some old friends... but it's hard to just disregard the natural and trust God that He will prosper your time that u will not 'lose out'. it's hard to take the first step and believe that when u trust God, He will not disappoint.

but i realise that the time when i confessed grace the most was after the test. when i didn't feel so good about it. would i have so actively confessed grace if i found the paper ridiculously easy? and although i had confess grace before the paper as well, it just isn't the real complete trust tt i believe we are called to.

i heard God speaking to me this week. before that i was walking home from the bus stop, praying in tongues. i felt very drained tt day because of yet another day in the lib and was wondering how will i cope if every day was going to be like that, since CAs come every 2 weeks. it's be just a cycle of mugging for 2 wks then sitting for a test on sat, then start mugging again on the following monday. then i heard the ans. God's audible voice told me to depend on Him more.

i was close to tears.

i realise how much i was depending on the flesh, rather than on Him. i saw how much He was longing to come to help me and to comfort me. i saw His love and grace for me. and certain verses came to me. "my grace is sufficient for you." "i will never leave u nor forsake you."

my grace is sufficient for you.

man i tell u. it was just indescribable. the peace and love i felt in me at that point. simply amazing.

but it's hard. when i don't really have a problem that i can't solve in my own strength, i find that i don't turn to Him. God should be the first person we turn to. NOT when we have tried our flesh and found that the flesh is weak then do we turn to Him.

because it refreshes God to have you draw from Him. and He is infaillable and His ways are called good and perfect.

from then on, i really resolved to depend more on God. and learn not to look at my own self efforts. and even for small stuff, i'm starting to learn to depend on God. but the road's difficult, and i am weary. but see, the crux here is not I, but rather HE.

i was waiting for my bus the other day at the bus stop, and 'casue it was a long day, i was SO VERY tired. i even entertained the thought of sleeping at the bus stop for a while till i felt more refreshed. i heard God speak to me again (this was the day after i heard Him ask me to depend on Him more) and He was telling me to close my eyes and rest, because He will worry abt the bus for me.

tell me. would u have closed ur eyes? what if u close ur eyes and the bus just passes by w/o stopping? at that time there was only 1 other person at the bus stop. i struggled a bit and finally closed my eyes to rest. almost fell asleep. but suddenly i felt this urge to open my eyes and there was the bus approaching the bus stop. flagged it down on was on my way home.

but this was a struggle too. and i'm still learning to trust Him for even the most mundane things. there were times when i felt like just opening my eyes to make sure that i didn't miss the bus. but i heard God saying "are u not learning to depend on Me more?" it just made me trust.

i'm still learning and growing in Christ and those siblings in Christ out there who read this, pls keep me in prayer. :) one of the 'memory verses' that i remember from sunday school when i was still a little kid running ard: "trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding." and it all ties in now.

there was driving today again. quite excited aout it 'cause i'm going quite fast through the modules. had my 5th lesson today, and i'm at module 13. so if this keeps up, i'll probably get my license within 2 months. *yay*

dinner was good. had kuay chap from this newly opened shop near home. it's near the 933 duck rice. dad was commenting tt the dumpling noodle quite nice. :) the lor mee was quite good too. (each of us had a diff noodle for dinner... we can't eat tt much. *bloated*)

don't feel like going sch tml... what's on *check timetable, brb* wah... cannot lar. got anat lecture. but i'm just feeling so lazy now. don't feel like studying. don't feel like doing tut. anyway there's time to relax b/w now and CA4. but i'm only 1/2 way through the mugging.

and there's bs tml. going to watch a rugby match with zj tml before service. really got no idea it's b/w who and who or where we/re going to watch it. but just follow him lor. :) i'll probably go with him to suntec then find some place there to watch (according to him). not tt i like rugby or anything... but i guess it's good to go out once in a while and see what lies beyond my small circle of 'normal' activities. :)

which brings me to another pt... actually agreed to go jog with guohao tml. but when i agreed it slipped my mind tt have bs tml. sigh. sometimes feel a little guilty abt keep turning him down. but i don't like swimming. think i'm black enough already. could do if i was a little less black.

jogging's good though. i luv jogging.

really don't feel like working now. it's what i call the at home syndrome, cause once i step home, I DON"T DO WORK. and on days when i leave sch early, like today, i just don't get any work done. *exasperated*

but guess tt's ok for today at least. as i said, there's still some time to play with till CA4. and hopefully i'll do well. i like anat. esp with my previous tutor, who made anat come alive and very interesting. :)

life's good. feeling full and happy now. just feel like sleeping now and don't attend tml's lectures. *sleep*

u know why this post is coming at this INSANE hour? look and see tt the comment links are working. SO U BETTER USE THEM.

many thanks to anin for helping me out here. :)

ohoh. joan wrote a testimonial today for my freiendster. so nice of her. :) it is my first testimonial so i'm quite happy. (haha~~) although i know compared to others, they have so many more. but it's a start. *grin*

studying today was ok. covered a little less than mon, but still satisfied with the progress. have u ever studied till u dare not make sudden movements with ur head for fear of what u've studied falling out? well, that happened to me today. scary huh.

oh, mr T irritated me again today. is it him or is it me? but no one else irritates me these days. (ohoh. except mr F) maybe it's his time of the month. oh well. now when he irritates me, i just keep quiet. it'll be ok after 2 mins. :)

drank 4 cups of coffee in sch today. and had peanuts (literally) for dinner. there was something wrong with the titbit machine outside the lib, btw 3 choices of sugered, coated and salted peanuts, only the salted one worked. and the only reason how i found out is 'cause tt was my least preferred choice. together with a coffee it made dinner anyway...

maybe tt's why i feel a little hungry now. *hmmm... where's my biscuits...*

late now. slack a little and go sleep. *munch*

sigh. there's something wrong with the photos. can't get them to show... anyone can help me? *plead*

early in the morning before the 1st lecture started, mr T irritated me. yes, before the first lecture started. it was cause he was hogging on to some notes that i needed to photocopy, and he blatantly refused to pass them to me although i offered to do the photocopying for him. (not to mention he refused to help me photocopy them, which was why i wanted to get them from him in the first place). got the notes from him in the end, but was very pissed with him already.

but by the end of the lecture i was ok already. was talking and smiling to him already. cause i was praying in the spirit after he pissed me off so badly.

but still i don't think he should do it again.

and then i didn't do the tutor review so i had to go to the lib to do it at ard 9.

and then i forgot to bring my lecture notes. cause i left my file at home at the last minute. *irritated*

and then CA results came back. actually it wasn't too bad, and in fact i'm quite happy with it already, seeing how demoralised i felt on the afternoon after the CA. see, it's grace! :)

ohoh. the lib had a blackout for abt 30 odd mins at ard 6. felt weird in there, but still sat ard until i completed anterior compartment muscles of leg. still have quite alot to mug. and don't know if there's any other stuff other than lower limb.

and the science canteen's wanton mee with pork ribs is VERY nice. as andre was saying that the noodles store is his staple food (given the quality of food and the insane queues there).

going to bath now. :)

have u ever wondered, when are u finally ready for a relationship? i was listening to my pastor preaching on 'finding your life partner'. not tt i'm looking for one now, but kim reccomended to me some time ago. so i bought the 6 cd series and started listening to it. over and over again. when i'm free tt is. to date i think i've run the cds through at least 8 times. *grin*

and there are certain principles that pastor prince mentions in there that i never knew. do you know that there's no such thing as a 'perfect one' for u in your life? God is a God of abundance and he always gives us >1 very very good choice. we have to choose at that point. and know that every single one of these choices will be a good one. :) i thought i met her, and i still think so.

cause my God is a God of abundance.

and certain valuable principles in there show me that i'm simply not ready for a relationship. i've loads more to learn and grow first.

afterall, i've always wanted the girl who i first hold hands with to be with me for life. *is this too ideal in this world? i hope not.*

i used to envy pple around me who were going out with someone else. and when i looked at them, i felt lonely. and empty inside. and i would feel sorry for myself and feel sad the whole day through. i longed for someone to watch the stars with, to enjoy the sea breeze with. someone to take care of and to hold and love. someone to watch the sunrise with, someone to share my joys and her sorrows with. someone to pamper and love. someone to love.

but despite all these ideals i had, i found no one to share them with. u know why? cause God didn't prosper it cause He loved me and the potential her too much.

but it's no regret when i look back now. cause i realise that the venture would not have turn out well. :) i was a half looking for another half. tt shouldn't be the case, cause in a relationhip, it should be 2 wholes coming together to make a complete relationship. i was looking for someone to fill that emptiness in me, someone who would take away the loneliness from me.

yes, tt's wrong and i'm glad that i pulled no one down into a relationship with me that was bound to end in misery.

just a couple of months ago, when i looked at some of the couples i knew going out, i felt sad. now, i it's the reverse. i 'sort of' envy myself cause i've no commitments! looking at the very INSANE PMS (refer to earlier entry for PMS) tt i'm suffering from, i just know that it's quite hard to mantain a relationship and still love her as much as i really want to.

for all things have their time and place. and to fulfill this goal that i have when the first will be the last and the only one, i'll wait. cause desperation puts pple off (something else amongst others tt i've learnt). and i'm not desperate. not now anyway. *grin*

haha~~ friendster is so much fun! :) pk was very funny - he sent me a testimonial saying "hope should have more friends other than pk." oh well. didn't know whether to laugh or be irritated. but i was very amused. :) did somehting abt tt and added some other friends. still waiting for confirmation from them.

oh, it seems that andre found my blog today. i wonder if he''ll be reading this.

yes, the only reason i know he found my blog is because i found his. much earlier if i may add. :) and he now has a purple themed blog. well, i got my layout the same way he did.

wm should have a blog too. *thinks*

and everyone i know should have friendster so i'll have more friends linked in my personal network. currently i'm linked to >40k pple. insane. saw liu jiaming's profile on it too. added it, waiting for her reply. other pple include mario, joan, charis, gibbs, lionel etcetc.

just played a game with wm. and my mouse was driving me nuts in the game. it was moving ard and wouldn't stay still. yes, random movements when the mouse was still. couldn't cast spells on the right guy or place, couldn't buy stuff, couldn't move properly. very irritated. as a result, my character had the honor of being killed the most times.

argh.

but it's alright now. fixed it. :)

gan's back from taiwan today. told me how chio the bing(1) lang(2) mei(4)'s were. and he regreted not taking a snapshop with them for remembrance... *awww...* he also got some nice quail eggs for us. i think it was very nice though gibbs refused to put 1 in his mouth. it's something like quails egg in those black sauce that u usually cook with pork, but u can tell a 'preserved' taste.

and i like preserved stuff. *grin*

yep, kimchi, century eggs, tempeh, fermented bean curd, salted eggs, sichuan vegg. eat them all. *yay* funny taste buds i have. :)

oh yes before i forget, have to send joan my friendster contact...

i haven't really used my friendster acc yet, although it has existed for quite some time. it was pk who asked me to sign up for it so he could add me. *yay* so, i only have him on my contacts, which make it a grand total of 1. :) sad yar? but i expect things to get better soon.

yes, mugging and mugging. kim was so funny when she said i also suffer from PMS. and no, it had nothing to do with monthlies. it stands for Perpetual Mugging Syndrome. sounds scary if u ask me. and i think the effects of it are terrible. symptoms include long hours in the lib, loss of appetite, information overload, loss of social life, addiction to coffee, gradual increasing psychotic tendencies, fascination with arthur c guyton/richard s snells and lippincott's.

and to end it all off, there's always the results coming back.

but i always take comfort each time i think of God's word. and He promised that He will never leave me nor forsake me. and what joan said abt Jesus mugging with me there. haha~~ it really lightens me up. :)

i don't know how to live without Him. i really don't.

and there's driving tml. as well as on thurs. :) really want to get my license soon.

alright, going to slack ard. sleeping soon if no one comes to talk to me.

argh. nvm. i just typed some stuff talking abt the rain but it's all gone now cause something went wrong with blogger. sigh. it's ok...

anyway the rain's stopped now. time to go to church. :)

what type of relationship should a guy and girl have? just as friends and not as lovers. u think tt's possible? u noe, i really used to think that that was not possible at all and any attempt by a guy to talk to and know a girl more would be a blatant indication that he was interested in her (> a friend). tt sort of thinking really affected my social circle. it's not very healthy. and because u don't talk to girls often, when u finally come across the one which u think would make a good gf/partner, u just screw up.

yep. u just screw up. and it's not a good feeling when u actually do.

so how many pple feel the same way as i do? i reallly hope that i'm not the only one 'cause sometimes it can be quite odd when u just mean a friendship and yet pple shun away from u 'cause they think u're trying something funny. which isn't very nice, both for their impression on u, and ur impression of them...

actually i'm quite glad for pple like anin, charmain, emily, charis, joan, kim and so many other girls who actually bother to talk to me. come to think of it, it was only recently that i started talking to girls. in the past, i wouldn't talk to girls for fear of causing misunderstandings and being suaned... that was the enviroment and philosophy that i was imbued with.

and that has cost me dearly.

talking to girls is getting to know them more, getting to interact and hone ur social skills. learn how to treat a girl in a way tt will make them feel special. it just feels good holding a door for a girl and picking up the tab after a meal. not tt u are trying to impress them or woo them or anything like that, but it just feels good inside. :)

and one thing i've learnt is that when a girl talks to u doesn't mean that she likes u. precisely 'cause they all realise this philosophy that i've only recently discovered for myself only -- that boys are meant to interact with girls (as friends) and it's a perfectly normal form of social behaviour.

yes, laugh ur heads off, but i'm telling u that this is something tt i've only learnt recently and am still trying to understand.

u know something? the CA didn't turn out as good as i hoped it to be. of course the results arn't out yet silly, but i got a couple of qns wrong already just by checking with the rest of the pple...

really must confess grace. afterall, is tt not what i'm called to do?

and if u see my results actually looking good, u'll know tt it was not me but God.

went for XO- yu(2) pian(4) mi(2) fen(3) with weiliang and shuwei. it's was quite nice. $5 per bowl, but worth every cent. *yay* (found out today tt weiliang has another nickname. very interesting...

*argh, the long nails are hindering my typing. but i want to see how long i can grow them before the social ostracisations set in*

ms santosa's bdae is coming too. she went to celebrate with mr guorui. haha~~ scandalous... *grin*

caught a movie with the cg today. we (joan, charis, bene, me) watched "a time to dance". it's a very nice movie worth watching and closely follows some values i believe in. but there's one part i don't really think's right. u'll understand if u watch it...

zj and jiahao watched underworld. don't really think it's an edifing movie... but oh well.

went s11 for supper and sharing session. got a new revelation abt 1cor - that we ought to convince non-believers not by the reasoning of the mind, but by the Spirit. :) go read it, i'm not going to explain it here...

today's service was very good! again about tongues. but he was talking about how speaking in tongues constantly reassures us that we are in the H of H constantly. always in His presence. :)

my pimples seem to be getting worse. i just pray that they will get better soon...

the pre-lab lecture was horrible... it was by S D kumar. totally useless i tell u. 1st was his pronounciation. then it was his inability to explain in clear concise terms. always talking in so rubbish terms and tones... very irritated at the end of the lecture and just left for suntec after a quick lunch.

i'll walk in by grace tml i tell u. grace, not of my own effort. and mark this entry for the good news when the results come out. for it is written, "my heart trusth in u and i am helped." :)

as usualy, i'm just waiting for time to pass, till after 12 then i log in temp and go sleep... very tired already...

sometimes, i really feel very weary. i've been mugging in the lib everyday this week and some days last week from after lessons till 8-9, even 930... very tired really. and hopefully things will turn out for the better. soon. btw, CA4 is less than 2 wks after CA3. disgusting. (although after that, it's 3 wks before CA5! *yay*) seems like this mugging will continue for at least a while more... *sigh*

today was rather insane. sat at the study cubicle in the lib since 1230. not considering the study breaks and the 1/2 hr nap i had, i studied there for 8 hrs. oh well. going a little mad now... but i'm SO SLOW at absorbing stuff that i take 2hrs to remember things that others will take 5 mins. at least i managed to finish the CA3 syllabus today. now i'll have to remember as much of it as possible. go figure.

there's playhouse tomorrow. something like dramafest, but it's noteworthy to point out that there are only 2 plays - by the M1s and M2s. and it's a day before CA3, which is the most insane CA thus far (but believe me, CA4 will be worse simply cause it's on lower limb and something else...)

starting to think i might as well hall. cause i always study in school until so late. not tt i'm muggerish, but i CAN"T STUDY once i step through the front door. i'm a very low discipline type of person, (always end up listening to radio, slacking on the bed, eating talking rubbish to my brothers, especially now when they're having exams... haha~~) time just flies at home. and just can't seem to fins it. before i know it, it's time to sleep. :)

haven't bathed yet today. *eeewww* no u didn't need to know tt, but it's a fun fact! (but it's cause i got back home only at 2120.)

we had prac today at NUH, where we say a mannequine that was used to stimulate cardiac case studies. very interesting. and the dr teaching us was very friendly too! and somehting very funny happened... since we were divided into groups and i had mine in the 2nd group, weiliang called me up to ask me how to get to the lab. heard ".... does... lead...." at that time i was revising porphyrins and i thought he asked me about lead action... so i started rambling off on ferrochelatase and delta-aminolevulinic acid synthesis... he hung up on me without a word! haha... i was laughing to myself after i relised what happened after a min. tickled me for abt an hour, causing 'unprovoked' bursts of laughter. guess pple ard me thought i was mad. oh well. no dispute there...

it's cherlyn's and emily's bdae today! wow! i haven't spent a single bdae overseas, what more away from my family. don't know how's it feel like, but hopefully it's not too homesick-inducing...

alrighty. i'm going to bath now before the water starts to get cold... switched off the heater 1/2 hr ago... but it's quite a good heater and takes only 6 mins for enough warm water for 1 bath. :)

oh, someone just won the MXBLQ on 933. i think $300 odd. good money for some guesswork. :)

wow. u know, that was scary. i clicked on my blog site and saw to my horror that it was still the unedited form... i tell u i almost passed out cold. been working on this since i came home and if YOU TELL ME TT ALL MY EFFORTS WERE NOT SAVED...

it was because i didn't click 'publish' after editing...

anyway, there were, and so i've now a rather nice blogsite. *cheers* :)

i'm left with a couple of chapters to mug, and alot more revision to do. *sigh* can't remember all tt info... GENIUS andre was writing out all the cycles and pathways that we will be tested on come sat. insane.

ahh. the fatigue is getting to me. but picked up a little bit on source codes. hooked onto it actually. :) it's something that u can work on and make it nice. all for urself. *yay*

rather boring day if u ask me. emily's studying like crazy, staying back in the lib everyday (med lib too i may add). cause the chem engin pple have their mid-terms this wk. yep, exams are all this and next wk. in the words of wm, "soon we'll be the only clowns who have exams for the rest of the year." interesting. but yes it's demoralising...

tuned in to 933, and was very amused at their ming(2) xing(1) bao(3) ling(2) qiu(2). haha~~ tt chongqing is a clown. genius of a clown... trust him to come up with such crap. just listen to the descriptions he gives of the djs is just incredible... what more the dialogue after it.

haven't played wc3 in a long time... abt 5 days i guess. :) but don't intend to anyway. need to mug.

nice site *grins to himself*

http://www.nus.edu.sg/sars/declare.htm

yep, this has been a part of my life every since we got screwed so badly by the dean for not logging in temp.

without fail, day and night. inputing those meaningless figures till u stop wondering why.

funny, i seem to log on usually at 0001 and 2359. *thoughtful*

alright! time to log temp again. now where's my thermometer? forget the thermometer...

realised today that there is really REALLY ALOT to mug for CA3... siao. carbohydrate metabolism (including all the digestion and enzymes... i'm going mad...

but Jesus is there mugging with me. you know how comforting that is for me? you try it and tell me.

put some norah jones on. think jazz's great. it's just the perfect slacking music and snoozing tunes. :)

the results for CA2 came out today. think the entire tut grp did quite well. and andre's a GENIUS. 95%. left one blank and got 1 wrong. pple like me left 4 blank and got (erm... counting) 5 wrong. haha~~ nvm, i'll work harder for the next test.

which incidently is this sat.

Jesus is there mugging with me. *smile*

thinking of changing the templete for my blog, but yet don't know how to program. tsk. think this doesn't look all that bad after all...

anin got a little pissed with me for teasing her too much abt guorui. haha. think it's quite evil, won't be doing it anymore next time. not really very nice thing to do and anyway am i not a nice guy? :)

tongues has got me really intrigued... checked up a little on tongues just now in 1cor14:19, and all that logos and laleo thing is very good. paul put down the 5 words as logos. why? cause they are due to the speaking of the 10k words, which are also logos. so meaningful... :)

there's still alot to mug for CA3... i as telling joan just now how much i have to mug and she was quite nice to remind me that Jesus is there mugging with me! really, that never occured to me.

"i will never leave u nor forsake you!"

cool huh. :)

think i need to go get another pair of pants. hmm. i like the bossini grey one that i have. very comfy and yet the design is quite ok. :)

church today was excellent. cg had a sharing session and we sat ard at kenny rogers discussing abt some passages and revelations that they had. jiahao had some quite nice revelation about psalms 112 (i think). then zj on genesis 22. which i also think is so beautiful. very touching and reminds me so much that i'm so loved by God. :) karen on jeremiah (about the buying back of the field - which is the world, and the pple in it, which is us, about using silver [redemption] and sorts.) WOW!. really very good. the only regret there was buying too much food. i ate before leaving the house, so i was already rather full when i got there. still shared a meal with zj... chicken and ribs and muffin and 4 SIDE DISHES. my goodness. *bloated* we didn't finish the ribs anyway.

this thing about tongues is really arousing something in me. :)

alright, dinner's back. feeling rather hungry, tired and have a bit of a headache now too. :(

today was a rather unfruitful day... i should have been mugging. cause there's CA3 this coming sat... and it's on alot of bio chem rubbish, together with a seperate paper on physio - dna and blood. *sigh*

but no, i was not mugging. playing wc3, slacking ard. :) aiyoh. slack so much. :)

i'm listening to pastor prince's tape on speaking in tongues. i really believe what he is saying about the end times being here and the new changes that the Church of Christ is going through. i think what he says about speaking in tongues is SO true and it just brings an 'agreement' in me. wow. we're in the end times bro. :)

but 1 thing i don't really agree is that we are the last generation (that will not see death). i think we're not really the last, but rather the grandchildren's generation will be the one which will not see death. (haha, based on some rough calculations that i made)

but 1 thing is for sure, restoration to the church is coming! Praise the Lord!

took to drinking wine. :) haha. carrefour has a wine fair now. i bought 2 bottles of jacob's creek red wine. carbarnet sauvignon and some other which i can't remember. it's rather nice. sweet. although i mnust delcare i'm no wine connoisseur. :)

i sent a mail to cherlyn today. wonder how's she's doing over there. wonder how was the flight. but anyway i don't think it's that easy to get an internet connecection yet. but anyway she didn't reply to my sms on the plane.

mr moh is sick at home. fever it seems.

oh yar. u know what elpis means? nope, not saying.

the books from the pm book prize are still untouched... don't have time for it anyway. so till some other time... hope they won't go yellow by then. haha~~ :)

so, i won't be doing a duplicate for my diary. guess yesterday was it's last entry.

alrighty then, goodnight. and hopefully tml will be more efficient. :)

this is the first entry in this blog. i think it'll be quite nice of i could post my thoughts online instead of just saving it up on my comp. maybe someone will read it and comment on my thought. :) anyway this is rather annonymous so it's just an online diary to me. :) keepinging my own diary for quite some time already, so now this will be where i write my thoughts instead! :p hope i'll be able to keep up with the entries as often as i did with my diary...